So…

So I turned down the internship at the Film Arts Foundation today for a number of reason but reasons I do not want to discuss…Its just better this way.

So today was my last class…Im all done…My first year of film school is over with. It amazes me that its almost a year since I moved here to San Francisco. Doesnt really seem like it but it obviously is. I really have fallen in love with SF, yes there was a point where I wasnt happy but it wasnt here that made me unhappy it was myself and the loneliness I felt after returning from NY, where I was constantly around people I loved, where here I had a hard time making quality friends, ones who didnt talk bad about me, ones who didnt judge me, ones who respected me and vice versa. I believe theres good in all people, hence why I get hurt most of the time. I discovered alot about people I was hanging around with out around here. I learned I was comprimising who I was to fit in, when all I have ever done was be myself and not give a shit of what anyone thought.

No more pretending…
No more lying…
No more of them!

I did it because I had to…I still talk to some of them and I do like all of them as individuals, but together, its ridiculous, judging others, being “bitches”, was apparently what it was all about. I to will be the first to say Im not perfect. I have my faults. Im not beautiful. I dont have perfect skin, or teeth, or hair. I have my issues just like everyone else in the world…
But the differences is, I embrace my differences and accept them for and as of part of who I am, where they judge others instead of accepting others for who they are.

I love me. I can honestly say that. First time in my life I’ve been able to…I wonder if they can say the same…

Till next time…
See you NYers in 11 days!! :O)

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